Because of the similarity of ghosts – recent surveys pinpoint the number of people who have been possessed by ghosts at 30 percent and the number of people reporting ghosts up to 85 percent – ghosts need to be seen as a potential risk in any dating scenario. . “Dating is about managing uncertainty,” says Alexandra Solomon, PhD, a clinical psychologist who points out the fact that we cannot fully predict what others are going to do: “We cannot eliminate the risk of dating, but we can. . Agree with us and the ways we take care of ourselves that can help us feel stronger, stronger and safer – even when facing risks. “
“We can’t eliminate risk from dating, but we can compromise with ourselves and the ways we take care of ourselves that can help us feel stronger, stronger and safer.” – Alexandra Solomon, PhD, Clinical Psychologist
Separately, however, the fate of your relationship is not entirely in your partner’s will. While they are certain Able To get lost at any point, you may have some agency to prevent that from happening. Below, relationship experts share advice on how to prevent ghosts when dating, as well as strategies to reduce ghost injuries, this should be the end.
3 tips to reduce the chances of getting ghosts
It is worth repeating that there is no way to completely stop the ghost, and that event is not your reflection, Dr. Solomon says: “It’s not your fault for being a ghost.”
However, there are some good dating practices that can naturally reduce the chances of losing the person you see for lack of explanation — that is, strategies on how to avoid being possessed by ghosts “to some extent,” Drs. Solomon says, “Without, of course, reducing that risk to zero.”
1. Go from virtual to IRL dates as soon as you feel comfortable
Dr. Solomon laments the virtual dating landscape as a breeding ground for ghosts. So, if you are in the early stages of dating someone, it would be wise for you to make quick changes to meet in person from texting or talking on the phone, she says.
“I think, sometimes, people hang out for long periods of time in screen-to-screen communication, and that kind of communication is so weak and abstract that it can be easy for people to kill ghosts,” he said. Says Solomon.
2. Do your part to communicate clearly
Healthy communication goes two ways. And if you’re not easily cuddling along the way and contributing half of the conversation, it’s much easier for the other person to feel it. They are Feeling ghostly, at least partially, and only to take another exit from their relationship highway.
“You choose how you communicate with other people and you have control over what you do in response to their behavior.” – Relationship therapist Omar Ruiz, LMFT
Relationship therapist Omar Ruiz, LMFT, therefore emphasizes clear and consistent communication as a strategy to reduce the likelihood of demon possession. “How you choose to communicate with other people and how you control the actions you take in response to their behavior,” he says. And the more consistently you express yourself, the less likely you are to fall into the trap of ghosts through misinformation.
3. Set parameters and stick to them
It is important to be clear, both to you and the person you are dating, about the needs and expectations of your relationship, so that your partner does not have to worry about what to do to satisfy them. “It means being realistic about what you want and need from someone,” says Ruiz, who suggests asking yourself: Do you want someone to take the time to get to know you at least once a week? Do you want someone to respond to your text messages at least once or twice a day? Want someone looking for a particular type of dating result?
Answering these questions and sharing your answers with the person you’re dating is a useful level-set: this conversation will give you Both A clear idea of how your relationship can really work. And if that doesn’t work, the “why” is the bait for a mutual break-up conversation, instead, your partner is less likely to fade into the ether.
4 Tips to Prevent Emotional Pain
1. Resist the urge to take the ghost personally
It is natural to be confused if someone you care about is missing. And in trying to explain this action, you may be tempted to ask questions wYou may have done this to make a person a ghost. “Helplessness is uncomfortable, and sometimes we choose to beat ourselves up because at least it gives us the illusion of control,” he said. Says Solomon.
But going down the rabbit hole of self-blame will only add to the stress and sadness you are feeling – and for no good reason, either the ghost’s fault is not the ghost’s, the ghost’s. Ruiz says, “People who are possessed by ghosts are not comfortable coping with the feelings that come from being honest with others.” “For them, it’s easier to avoid a collision than to break up.” And it reflects a deficiency in their relative skill set, not an indicator of anything about you – so it is important to avoid the spiral of self-blame, to be possessed by ghosts.
2. Prove that you have been hurt
“It sounds ironic, but we tend to lengthen ourselves so that we do not hurt our injuries and frustrations. So much“We only had three dates,” says Dr. Solomon. “Saying things like ‘my friends don’t like them either’ or ‘I had some reservations anyway’ only serves to invalidate the pain and grief you are feeling.” “On the contrary, acknowledging any pain you may feel can actually help you to feel less over time.
“Physicians like to say, there is a way out,” said Dr. Says Solomon. “So, keeping the injury at the exact length, width and height will help you move it more easily, more seamlessly, and possibly even faster.”
3. Identify the external forces that make ghosts comfortable
Yes, demons are totally to blame for their demonic actions. But, thinking about the current dating context – and ways to make it easier for ghosts – can also help reduce the pain that ghosts can trigger. Dr. Solomon says, “Ghosts are part of the low-accountability dating environment that exists right now.” , Very few dating relationships. “
It’s not a very useful reference for ghosts that can change the way you think about ghosts right now. “Remembering that ghosts are a symptom of a systemic problem in the dating world can help reduce its impact,” he said. Says Solomon. “It can really help you to know that it’s not just happening.”
4. Make a commitment to be a non-ghost yourself
While ensuring this You Don’t be a ghost Others will not prevent you from becoming a ghost in a moment, it can definitely help you to learn and grow from ghost experience instead of getting into pain.
In that area, try to avoid being haunted not only in your dating life but also in work, friendships and family responsibilities, Dr. Solomon says: “There is something about being able to be proud of the way you communicate and communicate. Knowing how to close the loopholes and how deeply you have invested in your honesty can help you to accept when others do not. “
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